The Adulterous Heart

My apologies for being slow to get the next installment up.  I felt impressed to go a different direction than I had planned, which is fine, but then I got COVID and was out of commission for a while.

Last time, we finished our review of the Abundant Heart series with the final installment on the subject of fear.  If you haven’t been following along, I would invite you to go back through the previous installments as each installment is dependent upon the previous lessons.  We are building line upon line and precept upon precept.  I was supposed to start a section on jealousy and envy, but I felt God’s prompting to go a different direction today.  Today, I want to discuss the Adulterous heart.  We will be looking at both the heart of individuals involved in adultery and also the adulterous heart of the church today. Yes, you read that right.  The adulterous heart of the church.  I hope those words are enough to capture your attention for a few minutes.

It is now about a month and a half since the 2020 election and yesterday the electors cast their votes. While not 100% final (that will be January 6 when congress certifies that vote), barring some unforeseen circumstance, Joe Biden will be sworn in on January 20th.  There are still some ongoing court cases which could bring to light that unforeseen circumstance.  For many, this is immaterial.  There are some that are dancing in the streets and others that are growing despondent as if they are lost and without hope.  I am writing about this because there are Christians in both camps.  As I was praying, I became aware that in both cases, these people share a common trait.  Their hearts (in both cases) are not where they should be with God.  Their trust is either in Biden or it is in Trump.  They are wrong either way.

As believers, we are in this world but we are not of it.  Certainly, we as believers can and should be active politically.  Whether it is simply exercising your right to vote, volunteering for a political candidate or even running for political office yourself.  All of these are good things to be involved in as God leads and guides you in the affairs of life.  It’s all part of being a good citizen within your community.

However, what I am seeing today within the Church is alarming.  Christian brothers and sisters pitted against each other.  Insults are being hurled against others simply because they voted for a different candidate… and then there is the name calling.  Anger and mistrust is rampant.  One side is celebrating and the other is in fear.  Soon, I suspect those positions could still switch because God is testing hearts in this season.  There is a reason for this and you’re probably not going to like it, but here it is.  We are an adulterous generation.  Our problems (speaking to those within the church), are less political and more heart related.  As I was praying, I began to see things from His perspective and how this impacts his own heart.  So today, we are going to take a look at the adulterous heart.

Self Centered

Adultery is, at its core, a self centered action. While love pays no attention to a suffered wrong, the adulterer and the adulteress  pay no attention to the consequences of their actions.  They don’t see the deep hurt they cause in their spouse and they don’t care about what their actions might do to their family.  The betrayal of the most sacred trust and the lasting destruction that their actions cause in the lives of their children (even if grown) is lost on them until it is too late.  All they can see is what they want in the moment and nothing else.

Deception

The adulterous heart deceives.  It lives in a web of lies, half truths and deceptions that it uses to hide its  actions.  The adulterer/adulteress can kiss their spouse, say “I love you” and then run off to violate their marriage covenant with another.  Sadly, they think their plans are foolproof and nobody could possibly know or even suspect a thing.  This is rarely the case.  Perhaps for a while, but then the deception begins to fall apart and unbeknownst to them, their spouse is figuring it out.  Remember the woman caught in the very act of adultery?  She was caught for a reason.

The adulterous heart is constantly lying and always looking to see if they have been seen. It is always strategizing and is a master at keeping things hidden in darkness. 

Job 24:15  And the eye of the adulterer waits for the twilight, saying, No eye will see me; and he puts a covering on his face.

The adulterer/adulteress can look you right in the eye and lie to your face.  No emotion, they remain calm and cool and tell you they’ve done nothing wrong.

Prov 30:20  Such is the way of an adulterous woman; she eats, and wipes her mouth, and says, I have done no evil.

Comfort

The adulterer/adulteress is often seeking comfort or protection in the arms of another.  They do not trust their spouse to meet their needs.

Intimacy

The adulterous heart desires intimacy in another relationship outside of their marriage.  Fueled by lust, it seeks sexual satisfaction from someone other than their mate.

Because it’s eyes are on itself, the adulterous heart cannot see the destruction it is bringing upon it’s mate and the destruction of the home and family.

Are they getting away with it?

It may seem like it for a while.  But here’s what God says:

Jeremiah 29:23  because they have committed evil in Israel, and have committed adultery with their neighbors’ wives, and have spoken lying words in My name, which I have not commanded them; for I am He who knows and a witness, says Jehovah.

My friend, they aren’t fooling Him at all.  Read the last part of that last sentence again. 

… I am He who knows and a witness, says Jehovah.

He knows, because he can see your heart and he can watch your actions.  He knows EVERYTHING you’ve done, EVERYTHING you’ve thought, EVERYTHING you’ve said and is the unseen eye witness of all of your actions.  So, if you think you’ve hidden any of this from him, you are only fooling yourself.  He is well aware of ALL of it.

What does He think about this?

Well,  He’s not real fond of the idea, that’s for sure.  Nowhere in scripture does anyone ever say “you should betray your spouse and have sex with other people.”  Adultery is NEVER the answer.  There is no exception to this, ever.  There is no sexual ministry where it is somehow permissible.  It doesn’t exist.  If you are engaging in any form of sex outside of your marriage, you are without excuse.  Here is how God dealt with this in the old testament:

Leviticus 20:10  And a man who commits adultery with a man’s wife, who commits adultery with his neighbor’s wife, the adulterer and the adulteress shall surely be put to death.

There aren’t any asterisks, there is no wiggle room.  It was a death sentence.  God wanted it to end right there.

Today, we aren’t under the law, but under grace. But, this doesn’t mean you get a pass by any stretch of the imagination.  God’s heavenly law is written upon each of our hearts as a believer. There are consequences when we purposely violate His law.  Please consider the following from Proverbs:

Proverbs 26:2  As the bird by wandering, as the swallow by flying, so the curse without cause shall not come.

And in case you want something from the New Testament, here you go:

1Corinthians 11:27-30  So that whoever shall eat this bread and drink this cup of the Lord unworthily, he will be guilty of the body and blood of the Lord.  But let a man examine himself, and so let him eat of that bread and drink of that cup.   For he who eats and drinks unworthily eats and drinks condemnation to himself, not discerning the Lord’s body.   For this cause many among you are weak and sickly, and many sleep.

So what is Paul saying here? It sounds a lot like Proverbs 26:2.  Look at that last sentence.  For this cause (not examining one’s own heart before taking communion), many among you are weak and sickly (life sucking disease), and many sleep (have died early deaths).

Beloved child of God, if you are engaging in adulterous behavior, you are walking in a curse. You are bringing that curse upon yourself and also upon your family. You could even end up dying an early death because of it. If this is you, I will have more to say at the end of this post that will help you.  But today, I speak of spiritual things.

Are we NOT the Bride of Christ? Then why do we pine for political candidates? Should we not be anxiously awaiting the arrival of the bridegroom? Who has captured your heart instead?  Are you trusting in Biden?  Are you trusting in Trump?  YOUR trust should be in Christ and Christ alone.  He died and rose again just for you.  Biden didn’t do that and neither did Trump.  Only Christ did that.  Yet, who is the one that holds your heart? My friend, this is how God looks at this.  Look at Mathew 6:21

Matt 6:21 For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.

Are you despondent because your candidate didn’t win?  If this is you, then your treasure was in your candidate.  He holds your heart.  if he wins, then you are happy.  If he loses, then you are depressed and even frightened as to what your future holds.  My friend, your faith is NOT in God.  Your faith is in a political candidate.  You are looking to him for comfort and protection instead of your bridegroom.  From the bridegrooms perspective, you are being adulterous.  You are going outside of your relationship with Him to get your needs met.  The answer is to take ownership of this and bring it into the light and repent.  Let Him heal you.  He must be your all in all.  Your walk in Christ cannot be controlled by who sits in the White House.  There is an erroneous teaching that basically says that because the church has been closely tied to the republican party and because their trust has been in party instead of God that it is wrong for Christians to associate with the republican party. To make matters worse, some proponents of this belief system have no problems with Christians having that same level of trust in the Democratic party.  In fact, they encourage this.  This is nothing but the political spirit on steroids and is nothing short of demonic.  This is like saying blondes cause men to lust so we must get rid of all blondes and cannot associate with blondes at all.  But it’s okay to lust after brunettes because that’s somehow okay.  Obviously, the issue with the blondes and brunettes is a matter of lust in men’s hearts and not the blondes or brunettes themselves.  In the same way,  the issue here is NOT one of party.  The issue is one of the heart and only the heart. Is your heart trusting in the bridegroom or has it found another in the form of a political candidate to trust in?  You, like the person in adultery, don’t see the ramifications.  You think nothing is wrong.  Like the person in an adulterous relationship, you need to repent and put your trust and your heart back where it belongs, with the bridegroom.

To those involved in adultery.

You are playing a dangerous game.  You need to understand that the enemy plays for keeps.  If you continue in your sin (and make no mistake, that’s what it is), at best you will end up on the outside looking in.  Your marriage will have been destroyed and ultimately even your kids will be aware of who destroyed it.  At worse, you will die an early death.  Your sin will be exposed one way or another.  You have a promise from God on this.

Numbers 32:23  But if you will not do so, behold, you have sinned against Jehovah. And be sure your sin will find you out.

Pay close attention to that last sentence. “And be sure your sin will find you out.”  Those first three words tell you what you need to know. “And be sure” is similar in meaning to “You can take this to the bank”.  This promise is going to come true.  The promise? “Your sin will find you out.”

Perhaps you think that because you’re a believer, everything will be okay.  I’m sorry, but the following scriptures say otherwise.

1Corinthians 6:9-10  Do you not know that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived; neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor abusers, nor homosexuals,  nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners, shall inherit the kingdom of God.

Galatians 5:19-21  Now the works of the flesh are clearly revealed, which are: adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lustfulness, idolatry, sorcery, hatreds, fightings, jealousies, angers, rivalries, divisions, heresies,  envyings, murders, drunkennesses, revelings, and things like these; of which I tell you before, as I also said before, that they who do such things shall not inherit the kingdom of God.

Ephesians 5:5  For you know this, that no fornicator, or unclean person, or covetous one (who is an idolater), has any inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and of God.

My friend, you are under grace.  But grace is NOT a license to sin.  God will not strive with you forever.  If you continue to push his law that resides in your heart aside, then the day will come where you find yourself outside of the Kingdom of God.

I have one more scripture for you and then I will tell you what you need to know.

John 3:19-21  And this is the condemnation, that the Light has come into the world, and men loved darkness rather than the Light, because their deeds were evil.   For everyone who does evil hates the Light, and does not come to the Light, lest his deeds should be exposed.  But he who practices truth comes to the Light so that his works may be revealed, that they exist, having been worked in God.

My friend, the answer is simple.  You must bring your sin into the light.  There is no other way.  If you keep it hidden, it is because there is darkness within you.  You must love the light and hate the darkness.  You must confess your sin to your spouse and to God and you must earnestly repent.  I know it isn’t an easy thing to do.  However, the momentary pain of confession is far easier than eternity in hell.  I recently read an article where some players on a professional football team started a bible study.  At this study, one of the players confessed that he had been unfaithful to his wife a year prior.  His teammates encouraged him to tell his wife.  The following week, his teammates asked him how things went.  The man broke down and cried as he told how his wife forgave him and told him she was sorry he had to carry this burden alone for so long.  This couple has found healing and their relationship is now stronger than ever.  The same can happen for you.  Remember, it is never too late and God’s arm is NEVER  too short to save.  If you want the freedom that comes from being forgiven, you just have to set your pride aside and confess your sin and repent. 

To those whose spouse has been unfaithful.

You have the unfortunate choice of staying in your marriage or getting out.  Regardless of what you choose, you must forgive.  If you do not forgive, this will eat away at you like a cancer.  Remaining in unforgiveness is NOT the answer.  If your spouse is willing to repent, then I would suggest that you prayerfully consider staying in your marriage.  If there is repentance and if you can forgive, then you have what is necessary to see restoration happen in your marriage.

Until next time, may God’s richest blessings be yours in Christ.

Copyright (c) 2017-2021  M. Unruh

Other resources

Prayer of deliverance from adultery